Sunday, 28 May 2017

May 2017

Have been depressed lately and struggling to enjoy things so I'm back on anti-depressants to keep my moods in check. I also did a blood test before being put back on anti-depressants and found out I have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, which is probably why I'm so depressed and exhausted. It's an autoimmune disease but it's manageable with medication that gives me the hormones in my thyroid I'm not producing, which I'll probably be on for life. I've stopped working to take it easy and recover, but all I want to do is sleep all the time. I really don't have a positive outlook for the future, but I've got to learn to take it as it comes and learn to enjoy things. It's hard because I go and see these pretty places and eat nice food, but it feels like it's not enough to feel content. I still feel empty a lot of the times but I know it's just being depressed, although sometimes it's hard to see that too as it feels like that's just how life is. Anyway, trying very hard to do things that are enjoyable even if it's exhausting. I avoid hanging out with people because I feel like a mood dampener and it's hard to act normal. I don't think working at a supermarket as a checkout operator did me favours. I hated it before I left for Asia, and I hate it now. I went to university hoping I could get a better job than a checkout operator, but I ended up trapped there again. In saying this, the job helped me get a car, which I got last month, and that has made life a lot more convenient. I've called her Zelda after Zelda Fitzergerald. She's a cheap manual Toyota Corolla hatchback, my favourite car. She does have a dent on the right-hand side but I think this adds character. She is also white and not red, but oh well, white suits the name. Surprisingly, I sat my full driver's licence and passed : O so yay!     


New Brighton


Watching duck hunters shoot ducks at Lake Ellesmere aka Lake Polluted. There were so many decoys that someone joked that the reason the duck hunters relied on hunting ducks for food was because they wasted the money, that could be used for food, on decoys. When discussing the toxicity of the lake and the unsuitability of consuming ducks shot there, another person joked 'then we see him go to his family and his children have three heads'. Oh, and they were shooting at ducks before sunrise, which is against regulation. Urgh we humans have to kill and maim everything. 


Went to the Botanical gardens with Sophia:


Mona Vale


Star snuggles are nice


Visited Yuki Pie, but she was mostly outside

Star ball


Spice ball 


Went for a drive to the hills


Storm's paw. Cat paws make teddy bears. 




Sleeping Maltese dogs compilation


Sumner Beach

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