I’ve been feeling a bit empty lately. I don’t know if it’s because i lowered my medication dosage and it’s just kicked in now, or because I’ve given up on being with my boyfriend for good, or because I got paid $35 instead of my usual $200 randomly so I can’t pay my rent or buy much food and my dental bill sent me a letter reminding them I still owe $230 and I have no idea how to pay it back. But anyway, I’ve been feeling unmotivated and dull. I hope it doesn’t get worse, but I don’t think I will. It’s just lonely, but I don’t feel like being with the friends that are available (only the busy ones, typical right?). I really just want my own pet to give hugs too because it helps. I haven’t been reading much of Game of Thrones (A Clash of Kings), but I know I want the story in my head. I know I have to do lots of reading for my studies. I think it’ll be good when Japanese starts next week. I love Japanese! It’s really fun learning another language. I like Celta too but I don’t like doing the homework.
So.. been on tumblr, drinking coke, forced myself to read some GOT because it’s amazing, going through tags of Haruki Murakami and playing “Norwegian Wood” by the Beatles. I would love to read a hell of a lot more Murakami, but it takes me a while to get into reading a book, even though I love books. Just turned on my fairy lights, eating dark bittersweet chocolate and I think I feel better. I really need to schedule some exercise in my life (apart from biking) because it really helps with these moods.
Anyway, I found this photo on my friend’s wall photo album and I think it’s so true. The best boyfriend I’ve ever had was the one that made me feel so loved and I made sure he knew he was well loved by me too. It’s important in relationships.
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